2023年11月18日雅思大作文示范写作 | 解决犯罪问题，监禁or社区服务

　　每场雅思考试之后，时间分享本场考试雅思A类大作文的范文权威解析。欢迎每周锁定。

　　本期作者：张婷婷

　　2023年11月18日雅思大作文示范写作 | 解决犯罪问题，监禁or社区服务

　　Some people think all lawbreakers should be sent to prison, while others think there are better alternatives for those whose crimes are minor, such as making them do work for the local community. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. (2023/11/18)

　　范文及解析

　　Introduction

　　Many people cling to imprisonment as a deterrent to bar people from perpetrating crimes to a large degree. However, simply cooping people behind bars, instead of being an answer to the conundrum, has in turn witnessed a spike in crime rate over the past decades. Therefore, others purport that there are many other ways to curb this tickler. From my perspective, the long incarceration is not the optimal remedy to diminish the crime rate.

　　解析

　　本次考题是犯罪类话题，针对犯罪问题讨论不同的解决方法，方法本身没有对错，主要是论述其有效性;可以首先让步承认监禁对于犯罪问题的解决起到较好的震慑作用，再论述对于较轻的犯罪行为应当采用其他方法比如work for the local community;

　　❖ cling to v. 坚持;坚信;

　　❖ deterrent n.威慑，遏制;

　　❖ perpetrate vt.犯(罪);做(恶);

　　❖ coop v.禁闭;

　　❖ conundrum n.令人迷惑的难题;

　　❖ spike n.猛增，急升;

　　❖ purport vt.声称;

　　❖ tickler n.难题;

　　❖ incarceration n.监禁;下狱;

　　许多人认为监禁在很大程度上是一种阻止人们犯罪的威慑手段。然而，简单地把人关在监狱里未能解决这个难题，反而在过去几十年里见证了犯罪率的飙升。因此，其他人认为有很多其他的方法来控制这个难题。在我看来，长期监禁并不是降低犯罪率的方法。

　　Body 1

　　Indeed, severe punishments inflicted on the premeditated criminals will not only embody the justice of law, but also render perpetrators to recoil from severe punitive measures. Indisputably, people are inherently afraid of being punished harshly, so when they are apprised of dire consequences such as longer prison sentence after committing crimes, those would-be malefactors are prone to flinch back and then stop embarking on a path of delinquency. By this token, this stringent policy serves as a deterrent which lessen the rate of criminal acts in society, thereby smoothing the way for social harmony and security.

　　解析

　　1) 对有预谋的犯罪分子实施严厉的惩罚体现了法律的正义;

　　2) 严厉的惩罚(监禁)起到一定的震慑作用;

　　❖ premeditated adj.预谋的;经预先计划的;

　　❖ embody v.具体表现，体现;

　　❖ perpetrator n.犯罪者;作恶者;

　　❖ recoil vi.畏缩;

　　❖ are apprised of v.被告知;了解;

　　❖ dire adj.极其严重的，极可怕的;

　　❖ malefactors n.作恶者，罪犯：

　　❖ flinch back v.退缩;

　　❖ stringent adj.(规定或条件)严格的;

　　诚然，对有预谋的犯罪分子实施严厉的惩罚不仅体现了法律的正义，而且会使犯罪者在严厉的惩罚措施面前退缩。毫无疑问，人们天生就害怕受到严厉的惩罚，所以当他们被告知可怕的后果，比如在犯罪后被判更长时间的监禁时，那些潜在的罪犯往往会退缩，然后停止走上一条犯罪之路。由此看来，这项严格的政策起到了威慑作用，减少了社会上犯罪行为的发生率，从而为社会和谐与安全铺平了道路。

　　Body 2

　　Nevertheless, the judicial system should be more flexible because some offenders, the minor ones in particular, are occasionally derailed by manifold inducements. Specifically, illegal behaviors of harming others are likely to be swayed by ferocious plots of TV dramas concerning gangs. Another chief culprit is, I maintain, the lack of education, by which I mean citizen’s awareness of laws, without enough propagation, is still faint. In this sense, a stricter penalty for those unintentional lawbreakers is far from sensible. Instead, condign punishments, be they serving the community or sweeping streets, are highly advisable, through which the law breakers will be instilled into a keen sense of abiding by laws and never go astray out of curiosity.

　　解析

　　1) 司法系统应该更灵活;一些罪犯特别是轻犯，会受到各种诱因的影响包括接触暴力信息以及缺乏教育等;

　　2) 社区服务可以更好地提升人们遵纪守法的思想意识;

　　❖ derailed v.越轨;

　　❖ inducement n. 诱因;

　　❖ ferocious adj.激烈的，猛烈的;

　　❖ faint adj.微弱的;微小的，

　　❖ condign adj.相当的;应得的(尤指惩罚);

　　❖ go astray v. 走上歧途;行为不当或非法;

　　然而，司法系统应该更灵活，因为一些罪犯特别是轻犯，偶尔会受到各种诱因的影响。具体来说，伤害他人的违法行为很可能会受到有关帮派的电视剧情节的影响。我认为另一个罪魁祸首是缺乏教育，这也就意味着没有足够的宣传，公民的法律意识仍然是微弱的。从这个意义上说，对那些无意的违法者进行更严厉的惩罚是不明智的。相反，谴责性的惩罚，无论是服务于社区还是清扫街道，都是非常可取的，通过这种惩罚，犯罪者将被灌输遵守法律的敏锐意识，永远不会因为好奇而误入歧途。

　　Conclusion

　　To recapitulate，taking original motives into account is a prerequisite for the justice of laws. There is no one-fits-all remedial solution for such a convoluted and prickly social woe. In spite of the efficacy brought by draconian legal measure, it is justifiable for the government to pinpoint the triggers of offending behavior.

　　解析

　　❖ recapitulate vi.概括;重述要点;

　　❖ convoluted adj.复杂的;费解的;

　　❖ prickly adj.多刺的;棘手的;

　　❖ woe n.麻烦，问题;

　　❖ pinpoint v.准确解释，查明;

　　❖ trigger n.触发物;诱因;

　　总而言之，考虑原始动机是法律公正的先决条件。对于这样一个复杂而棘手的社会问题，没有一劳永逸的补救方案。尽管严厉的法律措施带来了效果，但政府查明违规行为的诱因是合理的。

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